Somerleyton Hall & Gardens is the magnificent home of the rather important sounding 4th Baron Somerleyton and his family.  The palatial estate in Lowestoft, Suffolk is said to be one of the finest in all of England and a visit to Somerleyton Hall with kids offers a peaceful and genteel family experience.

Well, it does if they’re not visiting at the same time as my leaping, prancing and generally peace-shattering offspring.

Located on the Norfolk – Suffolk border, Somerleyton Hall & Gardens is part of the Broads National Park and a must see for visiting families, with a play area and immersive children’s trail that Raff and Sugarpuff become totally engrossed in.

My new BFFs Lord and Lady Somerleyton (OK, so I don’t actually know them, but that’s just a minor detail)  open their home to the public from Easter to the end of September, and it’s a stunner. From the carved oak hallway with its with green-veined marble panels and stained-glass dome ceiling to its deep crimson and white sculpted marble ballroom, their gaff isn’t too shabby. And by not too shabby I mean it’s flash AF.  My favourite room is, of course, is the elaborate library with its eight-metre ceiling and walls of beautiful bookcases filled with pages and pages of wonderful words, which can be read curled up on a squishy sofa in front of an alabaster fireplace. Well. you could if you actually lived here, which sadly, I do not.

Somerleyton’s sprawling five-hectare garden is a tapestry of rhododendrons, azalias, roses and wisteria, with a manicured central garden filled with sculptural pieces, at its heart.

The kids cart wheel and careen through it with joyous abandon, spin through the  enchanting wisteria tunnel and play hide and seek amongst its shrubs.

A charming sunken white garden is set within the footprint of a former winter garden, to the north of the hall.

A walled kitchen garden is a confection of ornate iron and glass with a cafe serving up tea and cakes, which the kids devour ravenously.

There’s a yew hedge maze, planted way back in 1846, filled with mysteries and the kids love getting lost in it. Me? I get a little claustrophobic after getting lost in in its living walls for a good 45-minutes.

In the greater surrounds of the estate, there are ornate pagodas and ancient oaks that date back to the 17^th century, plus a pretty avenue of lime trees dates back to the late 18^th century and cattle, ponies and deer roam freely, completing what is a truly enchanting picture.

To complete the regal experience of Somerleyton Hall with kids, stay overnight at the Fritton Arms, a 16th-century manor house that’s part of the estate, where Lord and Lady Somerleyton invite commoners to eat, drink and sleep (for a fee). Rooms are gorgeous, and its shabby chic restaurant is an enticing haven of mismatched chairs, squishy sofas, exposed beams and log fires. The menu is almost 100% estate-sourced, featuring pike caught straight from Fritton lake, Somerleyton’s own game and garden-fresh ingredients grown in the hall’s own walled gardens and Victorian glasshouses.

Somerleyton Hall
Somerleyton, Lowestoft, Suffolk,
United Kingdom

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A picture-book pretty county on the East coast of England, Norfolk is most famous for its network of navigable, lock-free waterways, tapestry of charming and picturesque beachside towns, quaint country villages, rich, straw bale strewn farmlands and big open skies.

It’s also renowned as the location of many a Downton Abbeyesque historic home, including Sandringham, the Royal family’s only private country estate. And it’s capital, Norwich, as the most complete medieval city in the UK, is resplendent with cathedrals, castles and covered outdoor markets.

To my kids  though, it’s best known as the esteemed homeland of the even more venerable Gran and Grandad of Acle. And while Grandad’s house is right at the top of their Norfolk hit parade, there’s loads of family friendly fun to be found in this bucolic British county. Here are 10 other great things to do in Norfolk with kids.

Things to do in Norfolk with kids

1. Explore the Norfolk Broads

Whether by day boat, river boat or kayaks, one of the most relaxing things to do in Norfolk with kids is to take a cruise under ancient bridges through the lockless waterways of the Norfolk Broads, passing picturesque villages like Wroxham and Ludham and dotted with old-world windmills. Head out for a satisfying yomp through the grassy shores and be sure to make time to stop for a pint and a play at one of the gorgeous waterfront pubs. Our fave is the family friendly Acle Bridge Inn, with its classic pub food, sprawling grass space and boat-shaped kids climbing frame.

2. Tackle Norwich Castle with kids

Polish up your armour for a visit to Norwich Castle, originally a medieval royal palace, built at the behest of William the Conquerer in the aftermath of the Norman conquest of England. A must do do in Norfolk with kids, the castle hosts tours aimed at all age groups, including one hosted by a costumed knight. Your young knights and maidens will also enjoy the museum, kids’ dress ups and battlement and dungeon tours where they can hear tales of its horrid history as a prison. Should little legs be up to the 62-step challenge, there’s a fantastic 360-degree view awaiting at the top of the castle’s Norman staircase.

3. Visit Norwich Cathedral

One of the 12 Norwich heritage sites, Norwich Cathedral’s 96-metre spire dominates the city skyline. Built more than 900 years ago, the cathedral is an architectural confection of arches, medieval roof bosses and intricate vaulted ceilings. Kids love playing hide and seek in its Harry Potteresque cloisters and skipping round its labyrinth. During the holidays, the cathedral hosts kid friendly activities and volunteer led tours. And be sure to keep an eye out for the handsome peregrine falcons that call the cathedral spire home.

4. Play in Eaton Park 

One of Norwich’s most beautiful and historic parks, Eaton Park, is a sprawling green space that’s made for families with loads of activities and a cornucopia of sporting facilities from tennis and boules, to cricket and football. From its pretty domed bandstand surrounded by four colonnaded pavilions, hedged rose gardens and boating pond, to its BMX and skatepark,18-hole crazy golf putting green and miniature railway, there’s 30 glorious hectares of outdoor fun for all ages.

5. Get art and about at the Sainsbury Centre

Art lovers will love the Sainsbury Centre, an art gallery and museum located on campus at the University of East Anglia in Norwich. Its world class permanent collection of works spanning 5,000 years of human creativity includes remarkable works by artists such as Bacon, Picasso and Degas. There’s also a very explorable sculpture park, filled with striking figures, iconic architecture and geometric masterpieces. While there’s something for everyone, kids will likely be more impressed by the centre’s star turn as a location in the ‘Ant-Man’ and ‘Avengers: Age of Ultron’ movies.

6. Unleash your little beasts at BeWILDerwood

Get little hands dirty and imaginations firing in the great outdoors at enchanting BeWILDerwood, an award winning, fantasy-themed forest adventure park in Horning. The home of Boggles, Twiggles, Crocklebogs and Snagglefangs, kids are introduced to the tale of Swampy the Marsh Boggle on a dreamy boat ride, before being unleashed into a world of epic tree-top mazes, marsh walks, zipwires, rope bridges and slides.  There’s also face painting, crafts and interactive storytelling for the littlies who’ll be enchanted by BeWILDerwood’s rustic magic.

7. Get ready for a Roarr! Dinosaur Adventure with kids

Budding palaeontologists will love Roarr! Dinosaur Adventure in Lenwade, packed as it is with all kinds of primeval fun. One of the most  unique things to do in Norfolk with kids, the 35-hectare theme park boasts life-size prehistoric models along its dinosaur-dotted wood trail, a rope bridge maze, high ropes course and dino-themed indoor and outdoor play areas for the littlies. There are also cute critters to be found in its secret animal garden, a deer park, golf putting course, pedal karts, splash park and more. Roarsome!

8. Head back in time at Blickling Hall

Blickling Hall is the family home of Anne Boleyn and it’s a great spot for families. As well as exploring Blickling’s splendid Jacobean mansion, a children’s map reveals the secrets hidden amongst the hedges of the National Trust estate’s historic garden. Those with a penchant for spookier experiences may want visit on the 19th May, the anniversary of Ann Boleyn’s execution, as it is said that her headless ghost returns every year to ride to the house in a coach drawn by a headless horseman.

9. Dig your toes in the sand at Cromer Beach

Cromer is a small seaside town packed with pretty Victorian houses and best known for its award-winning pier, fabled lifeboat station and crabs! With its long sandy beaches, Cromer is a favourite with families looking for a more traditional seaside holiday.  Just a short snorkel from shore is Britain’s answer to the Great Barrier Reef, the Cromer Shoal Chalk Bed, a 32-kilometre stretch created when dinosaurs still roamed the area. And there’s always time to go hunting those famous crabs that you’ll find scurrying around the pier.

10. Museums and mini golf at Great Yarmouth with kids

Great Yarmouth is a coastal resort town, about 30 minutes from Norwich City. Known for its long sandy beach and its arcade and café and knickknack shops pedestrian mall. Along the seafront you’ll find the quaint Pleasure Beach and Joyland amusement parks with rides and mini golf. There are a couple of good museums including The Nelson Museum, focusing on the life of Admiral Horatio Nelson and The Time and Tide Museum, dedicated to local history. And a summer trips from Great Yarmouth central beach to see the seal colony at Scroby Sands is a highlight.

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It was wizardry that brought us to Edinburgh or at least my son’s obsession with them. And while the Scottish capital more than delivered in Harry Potter inspired thrills, there’s are so many more things to do in Edinburgh with kids.

For starters there’s all that gorgeous Georgian architecture, cobbled alleyways, and its famous looming castle.

There are also gorgeous gardens, sprawling green spaces, funky festivals and a grand gourmet scene.

The city has high appeal for literary lovers, and not just because of a certain boy wizard. Before J.K Rowling, literary luminaries including Robert Louis Stevenson, Kenneth Grahame, J.M. Barrie, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and Sir Walter Scott called the city home, which is why Edinburgh was designated the world’s first UNESCO City of Literature in 2004.

Movie buffs too also find endless things to do in Edinburgh with kids. This celluloid star of a city has appeared in everything from Chariots of Fire to Trainspotting.  And of course, with a history dating back thousands of years, visiting the ancient fort town is an absolute no-brainer for history buffs.

And if that’s not enough to whet your appetite to explore, it’s also utterly quirky, kid-friendly, warmly welcoming and loads of fun. But don’t take my word for it. Here, Raffles (10) and Sugarpuff (7) share their thoughts on Edinburgh by kids.

The best things to do in Edinburgh with kids

1. Best Edinburgh landmarks

Amongst the city’s many iconic buildings and monuments, it is Edinburgh Castle that dominates both skyline and imagination from its lofty position on Castle Rock, a 700-million-year-old extinct volcano. Castle Rock has been inhabited in one way or another since the Bronze Age, been home to royalty for 1200 years and is still a working military base. But despite its best efforts to impress with history and views, Raffles and Sugarpuff were infinitely more interested in straddling its canons Cher-style and bothering the guards.

At the other end of the Royal Mile is Calton Hill and a fairly eccentric and eclectic collection of buildings and monuments, including the National Monument of Scotland, the Nelson Monument, and the Dugald Stewart Monument! And there are dozens in between including the 60-metre tall Scott Monument, dedicated to Sir Walter Scott, and decorated with 64 statues that depict characters from his works.

He said –  “It is hard to choose just one or two historical landmarks to rave about when it comes to Edinburgh, because the whole place is pretty much one giant historical landmark. I mean, even if you only walk from one end of the Royal Mile to the other, you’ll stumble over at least a bazillion and a half historic buildings and statues.

I have to start with Edinburgh Castle though, because it is a huge hulking thing that kind of looms over the city like Hogwarts. It doesn’t matter where you are in Edinburgh either, you can pretty much always see it.  It deserves its place as Edinburgh’s most popular attraction and you’ll need a good few hours to explore it. And if you happen to visit with my sister you’ll need twice that long because she’ll insist on stopping at every single tartan shop on the Royal Mile on the way up to it, so she can find “the exact right skirt”. Sheesh.

Once you do get there, it’s awesome. We explored the weapon-filled great hall, made our way into the spooky prisons, spied crown jewels and checked out a massive siege cannon called Mons Meg. We also stopped for the best scones ever at the teahouse and enjoyed epic views over Edinburgh in every direction.

At the other end of the Royal Mile, I loved Calton Hill and the Scottish National Monument which looked kind of like the Parthenon from Ancient Greece. I had a great time pretending to hang out with a groovy imaginary Greek God or too here. Except because it’s kind of only a demi-Parthenon (because the city ran out of money when they were building it) I had to settle for imaginary demi-Gods… but that’s OK, Hercules and Perseus make perfectly adequate imaginary play pals.”

She said: “Edinburgh Castle was amazing because it was so big and there were canons and turrets and dungeons and all kinds of stuff to explore. At the top of the hill (Calton Hill) I liked the Old Observatory and the big monuments which I tried to climb all over but couldn’t cos the steps were way too big for me. There were also loads of pretty old churches and cathedrals. “

2. Edinburgh museums and galleries with kids

Edinburgh is itself a living museum, but it’s also packed full of actual kid-friendly museums housing artefacts and exhibits covering everything from science and medicine to world culture, literature, history and art. You’ll even a find a museum devoted to toys and teddy bears.

He said: “The National Museum of Scotland has loads of awesome stuff like a T-Rex skeleton, but it was the Edinburgh’s smaller museums I liked best of all. The Museum of Childhood had all kinds of retro toys and games, interactive exhibits and dress-ups. I also loved watching my mum at the Writer’s Museum. She loves words so much I thought she might explode from excitement. But my absolute favourite was Camera Obscura and World of Illusions which was kind of like a museum of magic with optical illusions, puzzles, mazes and holograms. Super fun!”

She said: “I really liked all the displays in Edinburgh Castle, but Camera Obscura was the best. It was crazy and I loved all the weird optical illusions and experiments. We didn’t go to any art galleries this time but there is art everywhere on the street and I really, really loved it.”

3. Harry Potter sites in Edinburgh

It was in the back room of The Elephant House, a café overlooking the gothic grandeur that is Edinburgh Castle, that J.K. Rowling crafted a story that would become one of the most successful ever published. But it’s not the only Harry Potter location in this wizardly city that can be visited on a DIY Harry Potter tour with the kids.

Behind the café is Greyfriars Kirkyard, where tombstone inscriptions are said to have inspired characters in the books. We spy a McGonagal, a Moodie and a Potter but it’s the grave of Voldemort, or at least that of his real-life namesake, Tom Riddell that proves most popular with my Potterheads.

Then there’s the fairytale façade of George Heriot’s School, alleged to be the inspiration for Hogwarts. And the city’s many winding streets, including Victoria Street (said to be the real Diagon Alley), are huge influences on the wizarding world.

He said: “I love Harry Potter more than just about anything other than food and my mum. This is the city where Harry Potter was born and one of the best things to do in Edinburgh with kids is visit all the famous sites that inspired him. My first stop had to be for lunch at The Elephant House, where J.K. Rowling wrote some of the first Harry Potter book.  Out the back of The Elephant House is a spooky graveyard where we legit spotted Voldemort’s grave. Well not actual Voldemort, but the tomb of a guy called Thomas Riddell Esq, who is said to have inspired his name. And nearby Victoria Street is a winding cobbled street with funny little shops that I think must have been the inspiration for Diagon Alley. There’s even a joke shop there that I reckon Fred and George Weasley would be mad for.”

She said: “This city looks like Hogwarts, and all the shops looked like places in Diagon Alley, only they sold tartan skirts and bagpipes instead of wands and owls. I got a skit and it makes me look cool. And we did actually see a big white owl that looked like Hedwig on the street. And we went to a café where some of the Harry Potter books were written and my brother got to write on a toilet wall, which was a bit weird because I always get in trouble for writing on furniture and stuff! It’s not fair.”

4. Edinburgh’s best parks and public spaces for kids

It may be famed for its monolithic castle and stony architectural beauty, but Edinburgh is officially the greenest city in the UK with almost half of the city classified as green space. The urban centre boasts 131 public parks and gardens. No wonder my kids declared it “the most cartwheelable city on earth!”

And the green doesn’t stop there, just a few minutes from the centre is stunning Holyrood Park, a sprawling area of volcanic cliff faces, mini lochs, and dramatic hills and crags that help to shape Edinburgh’s incredible skyline. It’s also the location of Arthur’s Seat, a mighty hill that Celtic legend says a sleeping dragon that used to fly around the sky, terrorising the region and eating all the livestock. On our visit it’s just Raffles and Sugarpuff creating all the kerfuffle.

He said: “Even though the streets in Edinburgh are kind of narrow and the city centre isn’t all that big, there are loads and loads of public parks and green spaces. As well as a stack of monuments, Calton Hill has loads of grassy areas and trails we could explore. The Princes Street Gardens are also super pretty and all these crazy shades of green.

But for me the most beautiful place in Edinburgh is Arthur’s Seat, about a mile from Edinburgh Castle. Some people say that the peak was the site of Camelot, the home of King Arthur. It’s actually an extinct volcano and you can walk up along the mountain past loads of craggy rocks that are epic for climbing up and scaring the wits out of my mum who wanted me to come down all the time. The walk took a few hours and I didn’t see any passing knights in shining armour or a round table but that didn’t stop me pulling a stick Excalibur from the ground to sword/stick fight my sister all the way to the top.”

She said: “I loved all the parks in Edinburgh because I could practise my cartwheels everywhere. At Arthurs Seat we went hiking and there were heaps of doggies running up the hill who stopped to play stick with us. It felt like a magical place to me. I thought we might find wizards and knights but there was only rocks and grass.”

5. Edinburgh’s most endearing quirks

While the Edinburgh Festival transforms the city with three exhilarating weeks of the finest  performers from the worlds of the arts and The Edinburgh Fringe provides a stage for creative freedom, the city is home to wild and wacky street performers all year round, each adding a splash of colour and quirk to the capital.

He said: “So when I say Edinburgh is weird, I mean it in the best possible way. The city is filled with nutters. I mean there was a guy dressed like an Ancient clansman chasing me with a sword, a dancing Darth Vader, floating witches, dogs in sunnies, a levitating Yoda and guys playing bagpipes… and that was just in one block! I loved it. The street performers are one of the best things about this place and as far as I am concerned the wackier they are the better”.

She said: “A crazy, hairy, man wearing a skirt and fur chased us with an axe and made us laugh and laugh! And we also saw Yoda levitating and stormtroopers playing pop music there. Edinburgh is weird like that.”

6. Eating out in Edinburgh with kids

Scotland is famous for haggis and deep-fried Mars bars, so it’s no surprise that prior to our visit I thought most Scottish cuisine was primarily based on a dare. Traditional Scottish food is really good, and there’s an impressive culinary scene in Edinburgh that bears little resemblance to what I imagined. In fact, along with the trad treats visitors can expect an international smorgasbord of fab food and fine dining with a veritable constellation of Michelin-stars.

Really, it shouldn’t be a surprise, given all that fresh air, sprawling green pastures and clear, cool rivers that provide the elements for producing perfect protein, including Angus beef and salmon. Not to mention those chilly seas that sprout plump oysters, juicy scallops and sweet Scottish Brown Crabs.

Of course, you can still nab traditional delights like Haggis with neeps and tatties (turnips and potatoes), cock-a-leekie soup, the best porridge on earth and, if you really want, deep-fried mars bars! This is a city that caters to all tastes. 

He said: “I was really surprised with the food in Edinburgh. For starters its really multicultural and there’s so much choice. I always try to eat local foods when we travel so had to try Haggis with neeps and tatties. Now Haggis itself is bits of sheep heart and lung and other gross stuff mixed with oatmeal, onions and spices cooked in a sheep’s gut. Yeah, I know it sounds absolutely disgusting and when you think about it actually is, but it’s also surprisingly tasty. I also tried something called Cullen Skink, which is a creamy seafood soup that’s pretty delish.

But the two very best meals I had were at Dalhousie Castle. The dinner in the Dungeon restaurant was one of the most incredible dining experiences I’ve ever had, not only because the insane multi-course meal was so great, but because we got to eat it by candle light in a 730-year old dungeon, which I reckon is haunted as! They served modern Scottish cuisine which was ah-mazing, especially the wild salmon. The following morning at The Orangerie, Dalhousie kept up the fab food with a traditional breakfast that came with eggs and bacon, more haggis and proper Scottish style porridge, which is the best!”

She said: “I loved the food in Edinburgh. Especially in the pub. I had fish and chips and really yummy steak and kidney pies. But my favouritist food was jammy dodger biscuits and the shortbread and fudge we bought for my gran and grandad. I ate them all so we had to go back and buy some more.”

7. Edinburgh’s best accommodation for families

From its city hotels and apartments to fortress-like castles, a warm welcome awaits children of all ages in Edinburgh’s many family friendly hotels. We offer the kids the best of both worlds with an apartment stay in the heart of the city as well as a castle stay at 13th century fortress, Dalhousie Castle, 20 minutes outside Edinburgh. And while it may not be Hogwarts, it’s as close as my Potterheads are going to get.

He said: “We stayed in a pretty cool apartment hotel right in the heart of Edinburgh for our first few nights which made it super easy for us to explore. But we finished our stay at Dalhousie Castle. It is the oldest inhabited castle in the whole of Scotland and it looked a bit like a baby Hogwarts as we drove up to it.

Inside it was even more epic with windy staircases, vaulted ceilings and huge old furniture and it is supposed to be totally haunted by a bunch of ghouls including the ghost of a 16-year old called Lady Catherine. She died after being locked in the castle tower in 1695. Apparently, she rocks up to the castle all the time, walking through walls and waving from windows. It felt like I was in an episode of Scooby Doo and I was ready and raring to solve mysteries, but the closest I got was seeing my sister hiding under a white sheet to scare mum.

Dalhousie was the most amazing place I’ve ever stayed, and I wish we could have stayed for a month, or at least until I could do some ghost busting. Staying is legit the best thing to do in Edinburgh with kids, because it’s liking living in a movie.

The only thing I can complain about is the massive four poster bed in our room because awesome though it looked, and comfy though it was, we couldn’t jump on it like we usually do in hotel rooms or we would have knocked ourselves out on the timber canopy.”

She said: “I liked our little apartment in Edinburgh, because we had our own room, but I snuck in with mum and dad cause their bed was really comfy. It was also nice because we could walk everywhere from it.  But really my favourite hotel ever, ever, ever, ever, was Dalhousie Castle because it was a really real castle with turrets and a dungeon and a suit of armour and a giant throne and everything. I loved it.

Our room was really beautiful and looked like something from a movie and I loved the big huge timber bed because they left a special fluffy teddy bear on it for me. I called him Jimmy, and he was really cuddly. The castle gardens were super fun to explore and I could do cartwheels and my brother and I could play the best games of hide and seek. But the best thing were the owls. We got to hold our arms out with big gloves and owls would fly to us and land on us and cuddles us. They were so beautiful and fluffy. I think owls are my favourite birds.”

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Imagine if you will a magnificent 13th century fortress, set within acres of wooded parkland on the banks of a picturesque Scottish river? Then imagine storming it with two rampaging small people!

Dalhousie Castle, 20 minutes’ drive south of gorgeous kid-friendly Edinburgh, was once the stronghold of the chieftains of Clan Ramsay and is Scotland’s oldest inhabited castle. These days, it’s a luxurious boutique hotel where you can live in baronial splendour, even with a couple of tear-arse terrors in tow.

Only the thick foundation walls and stone vaults are original, and the moat and drawbridge are just a memory. Other parts of the majestic residence still standing today were built around 1450. Today Dalhousie’s 700-year history is sensitively reflected in its restoration, which mixes medieval stateliness with the quirky architectural eccentricities of its many former owners.

Check out this map of more Castles in Scotland.

Adding our names to Dalhousie Castle’s illustrious guest list

As we enter the grand foyer with its glorious vaulted Gothic ceiling, I decide that I am more than happy to add my name to its list of illustrious guests including King Edward I, Mary, Queen of Scots, Queen Victoria, Oliver Cromwell and Sir Walter Scott, who stopped in for a nap and a cuppa before defeating William Wallace.

As well as its regal residents, it is also alleged to be spook central. My mystery loving kids, who’ve watched one too many episodes of Scooby Doo, are rather excited by this. But as a card-carrying chicken shit, I must confess I’m a little nervous about our sleepover.

Carpeted corridors and creaky staircases lead to oak-panelled public rooms, their walls secreting many lifetimes of tales, both dark and delightful.

There are 29 uniquely styled bedrooms within the castle walls, some bearing the names of historical former residents including the aforementioned Queen, Oliver Cromwell and Lady Catherine, one of the castle’s resident ghosts.

We’re bunking down in a sumptuous four-poster themed room, and it is swoon-inducingly beautiful. With its exposed stonework, deep red walls, rich Scottish fabrics, sky-high ceiling and elaborately carved ancient four poster bed, it is one of the most breathtakingly beautiful rooms I have ever slept in. Not that I expect much sleep will actually be taking place in it by myself or Mr Eats World.

And no, not because we’re engaging in any olde worlde sexy time. It is because I will be slapping him about the head if he dares to fall asleep before I do due to my being terrified of nocturnal visits from the aforementioned Lady Catherine.

The 16-year old noble died of a broken heart after being locked in the castle tower in 1695 after she was sprung getting saucy with a stable hand.  She’s better known these days for turning up uninvited to weddings at the castle, walking through walls, waving from windows and plonking herself at the end of guest beds. And I’m sorry but I’m totes not woke on the lingo of cray 338-year old teenagers, so if ye olde bae rocks up at the end of my bed for a little middle of the night chit chat things are going to get awks AF – especially when I crap myself and speed dial a kilted ghostbuster.

Luckily the only ghouls who rock up are my own pesky kids, who thought it was hilarious to hide under a white sheet to scare their mother when she came out of the bathroom.

I’m also joined by an absolutely divine teddy bear, who I find on my pillow, but the kids swiftly abscond with him to their own beds.

Regardless of the poltergeist paranoia, it turns out my love of history and utterly gorgeous castle hotels outweighs my fear of teenage ghosts, and thus far I’ve not had even a hint of anything slightly supernatural, so decide to soak up the atmosphere and beauty of our fabulously historic digs.

We head on a guided tour of the stately castle to hear more about its fascinating history and quirky features.

Unlike his mother, who leans more toward being the scaredy cat Shaggy of our Scooby crew, Raffles is more of a fearless Fred, ready and raring to solve mysteries. Ergo, when we are invited to go down a spiral stair case into Dalhousie Castle’s grim bottle dungeon, where for centuries prisoners were lowered by rope to rot in the darkness of its 30-centimetre thick walls, Raffles bounds straight down to explore.

Me? I leave him to it and head off in search of some of Dalhousie’s high-end Scooby snacks and a chilled glass of champagne.

The falconry at Dalhousie Castle 

To give my overactive imagination a break, we decide to take a leisurely walk around the castle grounds, over lush rolling lawns and down to the River Elk.

A slightly obsessed Raffy Potter is now rocking a Hogwarts uniform because he’s  convinced we’ve entered a side campus of Hogwarts. This is mostly due to the discovery of the castle’s onsite Falconry, and its collection of much loved and extremely affectionate owls.

We enjoy a little time with our cuddly new owl pals Bandit the Boobook and Bob the Barn Owl, and undertake an hour long session with the owls-in-training.

The kids are left in stunned awe as the gorgeous young owls silently glide through the sky to land on their gloved hands. Hedwig who?

In a place that is already all kinds of perfect, their close encounter of the owl kind leaves the kids enchanted, and Raffles floating on a wizardly high, having had one of his wildest Hogwarts fantasies come to life. Speaking of fantasies, the owls even divert me from my spooky imaginings.

A right royal feast

We skip back to our gorgeous room to prepare ourselves for dinner.

Dalhousie offers a choice of two restaurants. There’s casual dining at The Orangery and formal dining in The Dungeon, which is housed quite literally in the 730-year old castle’s original barrel-vaulted stone dungeons. We choose the latter.

But first we sip on a pre-dinner whisky or three, which magically appear from a hidden bar, in the impressive library.

We nibble on exquisitely-crafted canapés in front of a fireplace while perusing the evening’s culinary offerings before being escorted down to the 2 AA Rosette restaurant (a bit like Australia’s hat ratings or a Michelin star).

The Dungeon boasts a menu of modern Scottish cuisine using only the finest local ingredients prepared with European flair.  And it is the stuff of last meal fantasies … appropriate given the setting. Dining on the sublime multi course meal of venison carpaccio with fresh shaved truffles, smoked duck, Scottish salmon and a selection of delightful Scottish cheeses in the candlelit dungeon proves to be an incredible dining experience.

In fact, if this is Dalhousie’s take on prison food, they can lock us up and throw away the key.

But only after I’ve been granted my last request of several hours in the castle’s Aqueous Spa, indulging its hydro pool, mud baths, Turkish steam bath and menu of fabulous treatments. Because you know, a girl needs to look and feel her very best, even if it is for an extended stay in a medieval lock up.

More to explore in Edinburgh: Click here for a great five day itinerary of delights for families to explore.

Getting there: Dalhousie Castle is situated near the town of Bonnyrigg, an easy 13-kilometre drive south of Edinburgh. Parking is available on site.

Kids view: Click here for a kids view on what to see and do in Edinburgh.

Dalhousie Castle Hotel
Bonnyrigg, Edinburgh, Midlothian,
United Kingdom, EH19 3JB
Ph:+44 1875 820153

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Written by Raffles – Aged 10

My mum is the only person I know who can actually make magic happen. She’s always conjuring up incredible creations in the kitchen and has this way of making everything my sister and I wish for come true.

And she does it all without even needing to use an accio summoning charm. She is so magic, I reckon she would make an epic teacher at Hogwarts. When I think about it, the signs have been there for a while. I mean, she wears more black than Professor Snape, is as strict but fair as Professor McGonagall, is as kooky as Professor Trelawney, as wise, and old, as Professor Dumbledore, (though less hairy) and she drinks like Hagrid (I’ll probablygetin trouble for saying that). She’s like an ultra wizard. Which is, I think, how she managed to turn our holiday to Britain into a non-stop week of wizarding fun.

You see, I love Harry Potter and all things wizardly almost as much as I love eating, and if you’d ever seen me eat, you’d know that is a lot! And though I knew we were travelling from London to Edinburgh on our way to visit my Gran and Grandad in Norwich, I didn’t know that Professor Mumbledore would conjure a wild wizarding ride out of thin air.

Well not nowhere exactly, it turns out that she’d been secretly planning a special DIY Harry Potter UK Tour for us for months, and every day was packed with Harry Potter fun.

There’s so much to see and do on a London itinerary, but you should definitely leave a day or two for Harry hunting as the city is packed with Potter movie sites, and definitely the best place to start your adventure. Edinburgh is great too, but more for book fans, which I totes am. Here are my personal highlights from our DIY Harry Potter UK tour .

Must see locations for any DIY Harry Potter UK tour

Tower Bridge, London

In the ‘Order of the Phoenix”, Harry Potter, Mad Eye Moody and their friends fly over Tower Bridge on their broomsticks. It’s a super cool bridge and though we had to walk, because Mumbledore didn’t think to conjure up any broomsticks, it was awesome to see it in real life.

Millennium Bridge, London

The Millennium Foot Bridge was pulverised by a pack of Death Eaters in ‘The Half-Blood Prince’ but thankfully when we crossed it didn’t fall down once, and there weren’t any death eaters around.  I know, because I was a bit nervous and checked.

Leadenhall Market, London

Leadenhall Market is a really old undercover market in London that was used as the entrance to Diagon Alley in “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone’.

It’s the most super cool place with this awesome ceiling and while we were waiting for fish and chips at one of the restaurants, I spotted the doorway to the Leaky Cauldron.  Although instead of selling fire whiskey and butterbeer it now sells eye glasses. I reckon Dadgrid should have gone in because he needs some … dude’s eyes are so bad I had to read him the menu at the chippie.

Reptile House at London Zoo, London

We didn’t have a lot of time to spend at London Zoo but did get to visit the Reptile House where Dudley fell into the snake enclosure in “Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone”. We stayed on the right side of the glass, and none of the snakes winked … because they have no eyelids. I did try on my parseltongue but none of the snakes felt like chatting on our visit.

Platform 9 3/4 at Kings Cross Station, London

I haven’t received an invitation to Hogwarts, but that’s only because I haven’t turned 11 yet. That didn’t stop me from trying to sneak my way on to the Hogwarts Express at Platform 9 3⁄4 in Kings Cross Station anyway.

Mumbledore says that Platform 9 3/4 isn’t real, but I swear she’s just trying to protect her secret identity as a Wizarding teacher. I had a good go at crossing through the wall, but sadly didn’t make it … this time. I cheered up though when Mumbledore let us loose in the Harry Potter shop next door. I grabbed a box of Bertie Botts Every-Flavoured Beans, though I didn’t realise until I tried them that they’d actually be vomit and rotten egg flavoured. Eww.

Bodleian Library, Oxford

From London we went to Oxford, which is near my Uncle Trevor and Auntie Poppy’s house and lots of magical towns like Marlow. Don’t tell anyone… but I think my Aunty Poppy may secretly be a wizard too because her kitchen is a magical place and she is the first person who has ever been able to make me like lasagne.

Maybe she wore an invisibility cloak to sneak in and steal a recipe for a lasagne love potion from one of the millions of books at Oxford’s Bodleian Library, which was used in a few of the Harry Potter films.

Harry Potter at New College Cloister, Oxford

I loved this spot because this is where big meanie, Draco Malfoy, is turned into a ferret in ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’. That scene always cracks me up. I tried to use the same spell on my sister but it didn’t work, damn it. Guess I’m stuck with her.

Harry Potter at Christchurch College, Oxford

Christchurch College was in in a few of the movies and its Great Hall was the inspiration for Hogwarts Dining Hall. It looked so similar.The Cloisters were also used in the ‘Philosopher’s Stone’ and its stairway and vaulted roof appeared in a couple of the movies.

This was also the place where Harry and Tom Riddle first met. I am happy to report though that Harry’s noseless nemesis wasn’t about on our visit.

Warner Bros. Studio Tour London – The Making of Harry Potter, Watford 

Warner Bros. Studio Tour has to be the absolute highlight of any Harry Potter UK tour. I mean these are the actual movie lots where they filmed the actual movies, with the actual sets, the actual costumes and the actual animatronic spiders from the movies.

I could have stayed here for a month because the four hours we spent exploring wasn’t nearly enough time to see it all. I got to visit  Dumbledore’s office,  Harry’s bedroom and Snape’s classroom.

We rode the Hogwarts Express, walked along Diagon Alley and over the Hogwarts Bridge and even visited the Dursley’s house, though they weren’t at home. We visited actual Hogwarts (at least the scale model of Howarts) used in the film.

I also got to fly on a broomstick (on a green screen), meet a hippogriff and I bumped into a five-metre tall animatronic spider called Aragog.  Our only stops along the way were for chocolate frogs and a hundred glasses of Butterbeer.

Oh, and if you should ever go, make sure you try butterbeer ice cream, that stuff is genius.

The Elephant House, Edinburgh

From England we headed all the way up to Edinburgh, which is one of the coolest cities for kids, like, ever. Not only is it super old, it has an enormous castle looming over it … kind of like Hogwarts. Oh, and they make the best scones ever.

But it’s also packed with interesting people including bagpipers and a mad Viking who challenged me to a fight. We even bumped into Darth Vader, a couple of Stormtroopers and Yoda, who was levitating on a street corner.

But we were there to see the city that inspired Harry. Our first stop was for lunch at The Elephant House, the place where J.K. Rowling wrote some of the Harry Potter & The Philosophers Stone.

I got to do a little writing of my own, on the women’s toilet wall, which is a graffiti shrine to Harry and J.K.

Greyfriar’s Kirkyard, Edinburgh

Out the back of The Elephant House is a spooky graveyard where we spotted Voldemort’s grave. At least the tomb of a man called Thomas Riddell Esq, who is said to have inspired the character’s name.

Victoria Street, Edinburgh

Victoria Street is a long winding cobbled street with funny little shops that might have been the inspiration for Diagon Alley. I reckon it was. There’s a shop called Diagon House that calls itself a purveyor of all things Potter, and even a joke shop that Fred and George Weasley would love.

Dalhousie Castle, Edinburgh

Ok, so first of all I have to say Dalhousie Castle (about 20 minutes outside of Edinburgh), is epic, even if it isn’t really related to Harry Potter. But hear me out. This place is the oldest inhabited castle in Scotland, supposed to be haunted as heck, and its windy staircases and cool ceilings make it look like a baby Hogwarts.

And we got to sleep there. Or at least I did. Mumbledore was too scared to close her eyes because she is a complete and utter chicken. Dadgrid didn’t get much sleep either because every time there was a tiny creak, Mumbledore would freak out and poke him awake. And there were loads of creaks… mostly made by me, mwahahahaha!

But that’s not what made this the most Pottery experience of the entire trip. The reason my magic mum brought me here was because of its on-site falconry.

She had sneakily pre-booked us into an actual owl encounter, and we got a private lesson on training them which was the most incredible thing ever. The owls were very well-loved and looked after and one of them was even white, like Hedwig, only way, way cooler.

Alnwick Castle, Northumberland 

Mumbledore left one of the best experiences until last. Alnwick Castle, which is pronounced Annick because English people can’t speak English, is a gigantic 1000-year old kick-ass castle that starred as Hogwarts in the movies. At least its entrance and courtyards did. It was the place where Ron crashed his dad’s flying car and where Harry first learned to fly. And guess what? It was mine too.

I first learned to train my broomstick to come to me … like a boss!

Then Professor Colin Potshed and Professor Perry Winkle taught me how to fly. And I nailed it, without a green screen in sight.

I wish I could share the secret to successful broomstick flying with you all, but as you’re Muggles, I am sworn to secrecy. If you want to learn to fly, you’ll just have to go to Alnwick for yourself.

Seriously, our DIY Harry Potter UK tour was the most epic adventure, and I loved it so much that now I want to Mumbledore to take me to New York to find Fantastic Beasts, even if I do have to cast an Imperius Curse to convince her!

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There was no way we could come all the way to Old Blighty without taking a day trip from London to Marlow, a town on the Thames that also happens to be our daughter’s namesake. And darned if it isn’t as full of character and charm as she is.

Located between Windsor and Henley on Thames on the River Thames, Marlow is an ancient Saxon market town liberally strewn with pretty old buildings and a surplus of gorgeous ye olde worldy pubs, all of which serve perfectly alcoholic alcohol. One is even said to have been the preferred watering hole of one Richard Turpin, a rather nasty excuse for a highwayman who, as his name suggests, was a bit of a Dick.

Add a picture-perfect river that curls through hills, past meadows, woodlands and gaggles of swans, plus a centuries old lock and a historic suspension bridge overlooking All Saints Church, a pretty stone confection on the riverside, and the result is one of Britain’s loveliest villages

The place is stupidly pretty, but beyond its looks, and its delightfully gin-filled pubs, the town also packs a literary punch that adds much appeal to this scribe.

Along with T. S. Eliot and convention defying poet, Percy Shelley, it is the town where Mary Shelley made monsters. Well at least it was the place she finished writing Frankenstein, though that sounds far less dramatic.

The Shelley connection in my daughter’s namesake town is one I enjoy as, just like Dr. Frankenstein’s creation, she (and her brother) are the progeny of a writer and were created in a lab using one part chemistry and one part alchemy. Though in the case of my lovely wee monsters, the magic happened in an embryonic cocktail shaker at an IVF clinic as opposed to on a slab covered in random body parts. I’m also happy to report that their skin tends not to rock such a nasty hue and, though they have managed to acquire a stitch or too due to their rambunctious ways, are both devoid of neck bolts. But I digress.

It is not the town’s prettiness, the river dotted with boats, the pubs, historic buildings, literary connections, monsters or even it’s name that has drawn us here today. It is family and friendship. By pure chance, Marlow happens to be located just 15 minutes in either direction from the kids’ adored Uncle and Aunty, and my and Raff’s respective BFFs, who we’re joining here. In fact, there’s so much love dotted throughout Buckinghamshire for our family, I’d be tempted to move here. Except… winter. And stodgy British food.

In fairness, good food isn’t really in short supply in Marlow, with a proliferation of excellent restaurants, cafes and pubs including an acclaimed two-Michelin-starred pub, The Hand & Flowers, and Maliks, an upmarket tandoori restaurant that is said to be a favourite of Chef Heston Blumenthal, another former Marlow resident. Both sound great, but today is about connections, not consumption. For once.

Raffles and his BFF are catching up for the first time in three years. These two first rolled their way into each other’s hearts at just a few months of age, barreling over other babies to reach each other in their quest to work mayhem and mischief together. The dynamic duo’s passion for ratbaggery and each other remained relatively steadfast until kindergarten when Raff’s other half moved to the UK.

His mum conveniently happens to be one of my own BFFs. Indeed, I would go as far as to say she is the Patsy to my Edina.

But we were both a little nervous that after such a stretch (a lifetime in their young worlds), the boys’ connection might be gone.

But we needn’t have worried. We stop for a curry and a couple of bevvies at The George & Dragon, an inviting pub near the bridge, the boys gibbering away between mouthfuls and catching up on the last few years as if they were a nanosecond, all their old BFF magic seemingly intact.

We work off our lunch galloping along the dreamy pastel-hued Thames, the kids devouring soft serves.

They clamber over fallen trees and chatter away happily, oblivious to pretty much all but each other, and their small curly-haired shadow.

We end our international playdate  in Higginson Park, a sprawling green riverside space shaded by pretty weeping willows and home to a carousel and an awesome playground.

The boys race to the top of an epic rope climbing tower before heading for the bouncy inflatables. Together they are in their happy place, and with caffeinated delights for us to enjoy while the kids do their thing, so are we.

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